Back from Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, and the rainy season has begun. It is not a downpour, but is not a drizzle either. It is the kind of rain that seems to soak you both from the top down and the bottom up.
As many of you know, I frequently experience what might be called “mini breakdowns.” These usually consist of me drinking too much and slipping into a period of self-loathing in which I vow to change my life permanently for the better. I vow to become more healthy, more responsible, and to unlock the “hidden potential” I’m convinced I’d “have” if I wasn’t such a “loser.” Which was what happened yesterday.
Interestingly enough, the highlight of this weekend in Mexico did not actually have to do with the wedding (I was in Puerto Vallarta because one of my best friends from high school was getting married), though it was glorious and the champagne free-flowing. The highlight of the trip came Friday morning, when my friend Steve and I “borrowed” the Four Seasons’ hobie cat and sailed three miles into the open ocean.
Never had I been so far out into the ocean without the supervision of some kind of “captain.” It was just me, Steve, and warm, blue water as far as we could see. Once we got past the furthest fishing boat we decided to stop and swim. We dove into water of indeterminable depth, opening our eyes to only see blue.
Eventually a lancha came towards us at high speeds and we knew we had been found out. “Did you guys ge here on purpose,” they asked. “Yes,” we said. “The whole hotel is worried for you.” “Oh,” we said. And then we sailed back in.
What’s the point of all this? The point is that one of the most magical experiences of the trip came with no alcohol and pretty much no decadence. It was just two dudes sailing in the open ocean, trying to get as far away from the mainland as possible without accidentally going to French Polynesia. Which reinforces in my mind how awful drinking is, and how I need to stop it forever. You know those guys who say, “I’m never drinking again” after they black out — even though you know they’re just going to get hammered the next weekend? I hate those guys too, mostly because I’ve always been one of those guys. But yesterday it stopped. Yesterday I turned over a new leaf. And for those of you who don’t believe me (aka everyone): Well….whatever.
This entry was written by , posted on October 27, 2009 at 10:58 am, filed under Central America, Travels and tagged four seasons punta mita, mexico, nayarit, nuevo vallarta, puerto vallarta, surfing. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
When you’re rad you don’t just travel alone, you travel under a completely different last name that starts with two “b’s” and looks vaguely Polish.
After 12.5 hours and a night on a bus, I have arrived in Puerto Escondido. I’m staying at Hotel Rincón del Pacifico, and it’s gorgeous. Right on the beach, ceiling fans that could cool off an angry rhinoceros – all for 200 pesos a night (p.s. with the words “Puerto Escondido,” “Rincón del Pacífico,” “pesos” and the rest in English, Microsoft Word is confused as fuck). The rooms, which are literally a stone’s throw from the beach (I have an arm like a young Jamie Moyer), normally cost 320 pesos, but when the woman at the front desk saw me in my skinny jeans and white t, beard of a week and face glowing slightly from the heat she said, “Damn, you look hella tight, I’ll give you the room for 200 pesos.” She actually said, “Damn, you look hella tight1.”
But anyway, enough about Hotel Rincon del Pacifico. The purpose of today’s blog is to talk about long bus rides. Specifically, long overnight bus rides. Having done well into the double digits of these particular trips, I feel fairly qualified to provide a few tips and tricks on how to experience a successful and enjoyable overnight bus ride.
#1 — Prepare for the worst. Optimism will get you nowhere on an overnight bus trip. I’m not saying have a bad attitude — I’m just saying prepare for the worst. If you’re leaving Mexico City for Puerto Escondido, imagine that the bus will leave late, the traffic exiting Mexico City will be horrible, there will be a tremendously obese Mexican woman sitting next to you carrying a crying baby which you will contemplate throwing out the window an hour into the trip, you won’t be able to sleep, and the trip will take longer than expected. (Readers note: Only one of these things actually happened. I’ll let you guess which one.) By preparing yourself for the worse, you can’t be disappointed — only relieved.
Stoked to be enjoying a pre-bus ride tamale, but still hella prepared for the worst.
#2 – Bring a bottle of water. If you’re in Mexico, I suggest the liter-and-a-half variety of Bonafont, which comes in a nice, long, uniform cylindrical shape. Not only is hydration essential on a long bus ride, but the water bottle doubles as a perfect lower back support. Maintaining excellent posture will aid greatly in achieving sleep later in the trip, as slouching can cause grogginess and prevent you from obtaining the proper exhaustion necessary for sleep.
#3 – Don’t worry about sleep! The biggest mistake I made when I was younger was to get frustrated when I couldn’t get to sleep on long bus/plane/train/mule etc. rides, which of course in turn prevented me from ever falling asleep. Don’t worry about falling asleep at all! If anything, try to stay awake as long as possible. Maintain good posture, don’t close your eyes unless they’re drooping on their own, and try to enjoy whatever scenery or movie you have at hand. You’ll fall asleep eventually.
Trying my best to stay awake. For some reason this whole theme of taking pictures of myself in the bathroom has really taken off.
#4 – Take a sweatshirt or a sweater on the bus. I don’t care if you’re taking an overnighter through the Kalahari, it can never hurt to have a sweatshirt or a sweater on the bus with you to warm you up and use as a blanket just in case the driver is blasting the air conditioning. If you’re too hot you can always put it on your lap. But if you forget it like I did last night and have to put your arms inside your shirts like those dudes that deal drugs on the AVE, you’ll be sorry.
#5 – Don’t listen to your MP3 player. This a very debatable issue and I’m sure there will be many who disagree with me, but I’m with the school of thinkers that think MP3 players prevent you from naturally achieving sleep. Especially in my case, since my MP3 players doesn’t do playlists. If I go from blissfully dozing off to Elliott Smith’s “Between the Bars” to being jarred awake by “And When he Falleth” by Theater of Tragedy, I’m going to be bummed2.
Hella positive at five in the morning after 10 hours on the bus (see #6).
#6 – Be positive. I know at the beginning I said to prepare yourself for the worst, but there is still a way to prepare for the worst and remain positive. Your bus breaks down on the side of the road and you have to wait an hour? No problem. Talk to some of your fellow passengers. Eat some tacos if there’s a stand close by. Go for a pee in the woods and listen to the sounds of the animals. If you stay positive, there’s little the trip will be able to dish out that you won’t be able to handle.
¡Buen viaje!
Next on Where’s Wetzler: Steve: The crazy, moped-riding Englishman. PLUS: Zicatela is fucking huge….
1She did not say this.
2Slash really stoked due to the fact that that song is fucking awesome.
This entry was written by , posted on May 25, 2009 at 3:56 pm, filed under Travels and tagged buses in mexico, mexican pipeline, overnight bus rides, rincon del pacifico, surfing, zicatela. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
Apparently there was a 5.9 earthquake today in Mexico City and I didn’t feel it. According to the wonderful and also very knowledgable Sarah Tompkins, people were “panicking in the streets” and electricity went out in many parts of the city. I believe this happened about the same time I was in the men’s bathroom of the UNAM faculty of medicine undergoing the sort of stomach trauma that’s to be excpected after a few days eating nothing but quesadillas and passing around bottles of Corona Familiar.
Another thing you should know is that I’m going to Puerto Escondido. This is significant, due to the fact that Puerto Escondido is one of my favorite places in the world. For my money, beach towns don’t get much better. I will be staying at the Hotel Rincón del Pacifico and spending much of the time at Playa Carrizalillo trying my hand at the small left pointbreak for which the beach, apart from its stunning beauty, seclusion, sparkling water, and hundreds of steps leading down to it, is known.
The shitty thing about getting to Puerto Escondido is that the bus ride takes 17 hours. 17 hours is a long time to spend on a bus. Luckily after the 30-hour hellride I once did from Ariza, Northern Chile to Valaparaiso I think I’ll be able to handle it. I won’t be hungover since I’ve now decided that alcohol is the devil, I’ll have plenty to read, and I’ll have my cell phone so I can annoy Barry with text messages.
That’s right, I have a cell phone! A Mexican cell phone. It’s fucking awesome. I’d give you the number but I don’t know it. Actually that’s not true. It’s 552 655 7324. Hit me up.
This entry was written by , posted on May 22, 2009 at 7:10 pm, filed under Uncategorized and tagged a huevo, carrizalillo, chido, chingon, corrizalillo, hotel rincon del pacifico, puerto escondido, surfing. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.