Hey guys—Chaunce here.
Well, less than two weeks left and then I’m peacing the fuck out. Mexico? The Caymans? Bora Bora? Who knows? All I know is that I’m out of here. Oh, by now you’ve all probably seen the picture above which means you’re all laughing at me. “Oh my gosh, he’s wearing a little hat with tassles on it. That’s hilarious.” You’re right. Hilarious. This is how he dresses me when he’s looking for a good time.
Anyway, here at the Wetzler household they keep going on and on about the weather, calling it “Deep Freeze” (some term Nancy picked up from KIRO 7 news), and talking about how the cul-de-sac has turned into a regular “Wetzler Winter Wonderland.” Blech. If I had the capacity to vomit I would totally spew all over Nancy’s hardwood floors and then taunt her when she was cleaning it up.
To be fair, though, I am a little bit sick of the snow myself. I mean, it’s not like I enjoy getting dressed up like a girl just so the guy’s toes don’t freeze. But what are you gonna do about it, right? I mean, if I could talk to God I’d be like, “OK God, enough already with the snow.” But I can’t do that. I’m just a boot.
Anyway, I hope you’re all having a wonderful holiday. I personally—aside from being attached to an assclown—am having a wonderful holiday and am really looking forward to New Year’s. This guy hardly ever takes me out anymore and I’m really excited to get out on the town and chase some tang. Remember that wrist brace I mentioned from Barnes and Noble a few blogs back? Well imagine that times a hundred. Naked.
Yeah.
Merry Christmas.
-Chaunce
This entry was written by , posted on December 21, 2008 at 3:07 pm, filed under master cleanse, the boot and tagged achilles tendonisis, achilles tendonitis, boot, chauncey, gisele, jereme rogers, tom brady, walking cast. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.
Hey guys,
It’s Mark’s boot. Just wanted to say “Hi.” If you haven’t seen me I’m the walking cast Mark is currently wearing on his right leg (just below the knee, you can’t miss it). I gotta say I’m not too jazzed to be here, so to retaliate I’ve decided to make Mark’s life a living hell. I’ve been talking with his left hip and she’s agreed to throw herself all out of alignment for a few days. I’m working on his knee too but so far the bastard seems loyal. Well, I don’t know exactly how long I’ll be here, but usually its about one to two months before they toss me to the wayside and I’m left to wait for some other “unfortunate soul” with an “injury” to come pick me up. Why are they always so excited to get rid of me? You’d think I was a parasite or something. Anyway, good to talk to you. I’m sure you’ll be hearing more from me soon, or maybe you’ll even get to see me in real life. My name is Chauncey.
Laters,
Chaunce
This entry was written by , posted on November 22, 2008 at 1:15 pm, filed under Uncategorized, the boot and tagged alignment, boot, chauncey. Leave a comment or view the discussion at the permalink.